The warped concept of how love or certain relationships should often hinders us to experience the same in an authentic way. Often fear is the root of this. Fear of losing people we love, fear of not having “for ever after”, fear of not having the same priority/importance in others lives. You felt a degree of apprehension, even fear, sometimes accompanied by unrelenting anxiety. It is precisely these strong emotional reactions that can act as a catalyst to increase motivation and commitment.
Though we will often hear ourselves say, “change is inevitable, I love change” – the truth is when our relationships start changing – whether due to distance, business of daily life or at times simply growing apart is something that makes us question our own worthiness. We insist on feeling what we felt like when we were together in high school or on how we used to feel earlier. We try and seek the old comfort, the old trust, the easy camaraderie that we shared. Growth is all about change. And change is good and inevitable. And though change arguably is painful it is often necessary – for everyone involved.
Holding on to how things were, how they felt is maybe, a bit unfair and even unrealistic.
It is our nature to change and grow. As we experience anything we naturally undergo a change. We are never the same after any experience we have. Well, on one level of our beings. There is another level but that has nothing to do with this question.
Relationships provide constant experiencing on many levels. Often, we enter into a relationship out of Karmic obligation or in order to learn something about ourselves that this particular relationship can activate. Some enter relationships out of Karmic obligation to bring children into the world. Then, it dissipates.
As we change, one or both partners may shift out of the energetic structure that created the original magnetic attraction forming the relationship. This means, either it is time to move on, or the two people make a choice to try and work it out. It will or will not be successful, depending on whether the relationship is still serving each person as a growth tool.
Two people who can move through their changes, challenges and trouble spots are those who are in a relationship effecting them on deeper levels. They are still meant to be together as Karma can also be positive. They have learned how to be in a relationship and can experience deeper levels of love, respect and companionship. This is a reflection of growth and refinement on each of their parts.
That is why relationships are so powerful in their effect upon us, and why they are such potent teachers.
Allow change to happen. Let the new you emerge – which is more stranger and wiser than the one you are leaving behind.